A man has an idea. The idea attracts others, like-minded. The idea expands. The idea becomes an institution. What was the idea? That's what's been bothering me, boys. I tell ya, when I used to think of the idea itself, it put a big ol' smile on my face. Greed is for amateurs. Before I knew it, every charlatan and shitheel was imitating me. You know what they got now? Devil's Night greeting cards. Isn't that precious? The idea has become the institution. — Top Dollar, The Crow
Maybe that's the problem with a lot of things. Somewhere along the way the original idea gets buried under all the stuff built around it. Something starts out weird, personal, and fun, then everybody shows up with a clipboard and a business plan and suddenly nobody remembers why it was cool in the first place.
Anyway, welcome to my cute little webpage on the line (thanks Vince Vaughn for that gem). You're not really "here" because here isn't an actual place. It's just HTML, CSS, some images slapped together, some questionable design decisions, and a bunch of ideas that somehow survived long enough to make it onto a webpage. Whoopdie doo.
It could be about my pet rock. It could be about my completely normal and definitely not suspicious interest in observing human behavior. It could be a ninja training archive. It could be a shrine dedicated to cute kaiju destroying entire cities. The possibilities are endless and the quality control department has apparently been fired.
Sometimes you just wanna go somewhere nobody else knows your nameeeeee... and they're not happy that you cameeeeeee. (That's what she said, huhuhuhu.)
So welcome kids: freaks + g33ks, nobodies + everybodies, somebodies, busy bodies, weirdos, ninjas, cyborgs, ninja-cyborgs, zombies, ninja zombies, and whatever else you roll with. Doesn't matter. You made it this far.
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| I'm a sensitive artist + super sexy super spy |
name: spike 🧬1.5 🇰🇷 Korean + 🇵🇹 Portuguese = 110% 🇺🇸 Americano, occupation: professional biz man :: enjoys the sound of his own thoughts (on paper), writer of words, drawer of random thingies, thinker of thoughts, and enjoyer of life + the art of aliveness. yes, an artist of life. just your average enhanced human. that's what I like to tell people. whether they think its true or not is up to them obviously. but really? they couldn't give two shits whether I was smoking crack or a professional assassin much. not many people do, they just want you to hear their stories or talk to them in therapy language. honestly I tire myself out just having to listen to myself. I'm a kind of archaic soul nowadays, a bit of an autodidact + a poet + artiste, designer + nostalgist (for the olden times, the saner times). I'm neither judgemental nor harsh, critical, mean spirited but I do love to trigger peeps that are. where I'm from you'd better be good people's otherwise gtf out, doesn't get any deeper than that. I'm from a hard place that's a bit tougher + more resilient than some. see we're better than 'edgy' New Yorker's because we might not be direct, its b/c we actually know how to put filters on our mouths and not say shit to intentionally offend people. east coasters are just retarded asshats, chickens with their heads cut off. contestants in a 🦑Squid game that's pure Machiavellian. I never got the comparison though b/c Chitown never tries to be NYC to begin with. I'm an art director who thinks like a poet, has the heart of an artiste, the mind of an assassin, the personality of a karaoke lounge singer + the spirit of a warrior-poet. all bundled up in a nice sushi burrito with extra wassabi.
you're here reading this trying to ascertain if I'm worthy, and I understand that. I'm not entirely too certain, I might be acquired taste. I'm merely a thought, a kind word now + again unasked for, and a harsh stern rebuke the next minute you also didn't like, want, but needed. the hero you didn't deserve, but desperately required. in our anti-romantic era one could only sterilize our information spaces so much before it gets filthy all over with the grime and corruption of our banal realities. what can I offer you but choice fragments cherry picked from a line up, that only you can decide is guilty of doing a thought crime: agitation, provocation, and prostitution. whoring my existence to tantalize, distract, compel, dupe, deceive, and manipulate you into stimulating my economy of emotional ghettoliciousness. if I accomplish this for you well, you've put a big ole smile on my face. if not? the artistry lies in the perseverance. and through much suffering + triumph, I'll get you there.
personality:
self describing self as a crazy chill city cat from Chiraq ; naturally suave + ultra sophisticated, disarmingly charming, razor sharp wit, and a classy, tangible air about him that you just can't fake or bite. with his cheesy cavalier attitude + propensity for getting in the middle of something, disruption of plans within plans and belting out obscure 80's references or inappropriate jokes (offensive). trained observer from his time as a sketch profiler for the Chicago PD during undergrad at SAIC (where I majored in visual design + chasing hot art school chicks). I tend to be accident prone in the sense I'm a causer of accidents in others. which is sometimes a survivalist trait when dealing with thieves or assassins (me: oh I meant to do that, right). still, besides all this high end luxuriant (dare I say opulent) sexy soul and bad boy exterior lies a kind, compassionate, intellectual, mysterious (hello ladies! *sleazy laughter*), thoughtful, insightful guy with a 401K and many, many clothes, plus A1 teeth that goes *DING!* (what can I say I drank milk growing up). recent dentist visit the Asian dentist was commenting how I'd never require teeth whitening like eva (she sounded all haterish bout it). then the Latina dental assistant said 'you have very white teeth' and I nodded and she repeated 'no, I mean REALLY WHITE TEETH'. me: so what're you trying to say, I can dodge bullets? yet these trivial details bore me. I don't care if I have a slutty pair of lips, deadly looking coffee colored eyes, and blinding white teeth. these granular details only matter to the mental midgets who accentuate them. I'll stick to being me and enjoying this.
frequently required
cheesy fantasy/sci fi with bad acting : Mystery Sci Theater 3000 : thrift bookstores : ramen 🍜: jams : karaokeeeeeeeeeeeee! 🎤 : chess ♔ : secret spy shit : 🌮 tacos : burritos 🌯 : Mitsubishi mechanical pencil : stoneit notebooks : Japanese tempura : mystery novels : interesting random reads : ad🐉d 1st edition : retro g33kery : 🔥 hot chicks : baywatch : retro kung fu movies :🥷 ninja movies : muzique ♩ : kaiju 🐊 : soju : kimchi : assorted art supplies : when Thai waitress brings me extra treats b/c of: flirting : blackjack 🂡
rolemodels: Al Bundy, Benny Hill, Alex P. Keaton, David Hasselhoff, Ferris Bueller, Captain Kirk, Vince Vaughn, Bruce Lee, The Vampire Lestat, Gordon Ramsay, Jack Tripper, Tony Almeida, Dr Gori ```
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| if you take your webpage down again I don't know what I'll do! - Brittany Fox, infomercial actress, 36 from Chicago |
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this is one of the better websites we've stumbled across, and finally a hot, bad ass half asian hustler at the helm of it all got me intrigued. hit us up sometime if you're ever in Austin! (Tina + Lillycat, 26 + 25, Austin TX)
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