these fools

every so often a pair of geniuses comes as a blip on my radar to pay heed to. these lunatics decided to cut down a famous sycamore tree at Hadrian's wall one day, for internet fame. so, isn't it safe to say it was the fault of the internet as well? possibly. the Sycamore gap tree being the name of said tree. anyways these IRL Beavis + Butthead's of the UK thought they'd get internet famous or go viral or something. I could only imagine what their conversation must've been: 

DAVE: Right. You ready?

MARK: Yeah.

DAVE: We're cutting down the tree.

MARK: The massive famous tree?

DAVE: The massive famous tree.

MARK: Dude…

DAVE: What?

MARK: We're gonna go viral.

DAVE: WE'RE GONNA GO VIRAL.

MARK: Mate, imagine the views.

DAVE: Ten million views.

MARK: Twenty million.

DAVE: One hundred million.

MARK: A billion.

DAVE: That's too many.

MARK: Nah, mate. The internet's massive.

DAVE: True.

MARK: You reckon people will be angry?

DAVE: Probably.

MARK: Like… really angry?

DAVE: Yeah.

MARK: That's even more views.

DAVE: THIS IS GONNA BE AWESOME!

MARK: AWWWWWW YEAHHHHHH!

DAVE: Right, so we film the whole thing.

MARK: Obviously.

DAVE: Then we post it.

MARK: With the title—

DAVE: “WE CUT DOWN BRITAIN'S MOST FAMOUS TREE!!!”

MARK: With, like, seventeen exclamation marks.

DAVE: And a shocked-face thumbnail.

MARK: And you standing next to the stump going—

DAVE: “Worth it.”

MARK: Mate, that's genius.

DAVE: I know.

MARK: What if we get arrested?

DAVE: Then we film that too.

MARK: …

DAVE: More content.

MARK: Mate.

DAVE: What?

MARK: You're thinking like an influencer.

DAVE: I am an influencer.

MARK: You've got twelve followers.

DAVE: Thirteen after this.

MARK: AWWWWWWWWESOME!

DAVE: Right. Let's become internet legends.

MARK: This is gonna be the greatest video ever.

DAVE: What could possibly go wrong?

MARK: Don't say that.

DAVE: Why?

MARK: Every time someone says that, something goes wrong.

DAVE: Oh.

MARK: So don't say it.

DAVE: …

MARK: …

DAVE: What could possibly go—

MARK: SHUT UP AND START FILMING!

imagine going to jail, and hard inmates wanted for murder and rape asking you what you in for? cutting a tree. which tree? oh that one the entire country remembers from childhood trips to Hadrian's wall. oh that tree?! all of these inmates will wanna murder these fools. at any rate, not just the internet's fault either. you have to protect such sacred things nowadays, can't rely on people's good behavior anymore.