autumn notes 🍂: 2026

October And the trees are striped bare From all they wear What do I care? October And kingdoms rise And kingdoms fall But you go on And on...-U2 

autumn's upon us once more, and I've admittedly been wayward, underground, distant, disconnected. I came back from my travels from a place that time didn't know even existed. a place that seemed fairly non-existent (for me). and as far as I can tell speaking purely for myself here, being in places that seems so absurd + ridiculous all at once was becoming an artform. feeling like Reacher in Margrave, GA. a fictious non-existent town to begin with made for the series. I was in Athens, GA. and I have to say my domestic traveling resume has been growing. for such a long ass time Chicago was my world. and it's so utterly strange how we Chicagoans are/were hopelessly innured by the lie of a perfect home in a overpopulated mecca of random strangers so distant, disconnected, and devoid of attachment they trained themselves in being emotionally unavailable as a survivalist trait. one thing I've learned from being in the semi-south (is NC truly southern? one has to wonder) is that these local yokels while they couldn't drive worth a hot damn, much less conversate they had a bare basic soul, and a regular sense of common decency. they didn't crave impressing strangers like urbanites who pretended life was a SIMS4 game. example: when Marie Kondo's netflix show aired, all Chicago did a huge self inventory and deposited an excess of fat to every thrift store, used bookstore throughout the city. I was getting free books from my personal fav used bookstore. all it took was some miss congeniality from Japan to guilt these hoarders into doing a 360. a lithe little Japanese chick got these repentant hoarders praying to their socks + underwear on Netflix. slaves of materiality seeking escapism from their escapist reality, kinda a double negative if anything. Sabi had passed away while I was away. I got the call and had to console my dog sitter who was crying for me. in a way I was glad it happened in her care, I don't think I could've said goodbye and been okay with that. she transported his body to the vet and went above + beyond. he had left planet earth, and I missed him terribly much at that moment, and didn't get to say my goodbye. but I was gladdened that he didn't suffer in a prolonged, agonizing way. such a strong dog, tough, sweet, loyal, and was with me through the thickest + worse of times. it'll be awhile til I get a new one, thart's a given. and truth be told it's harder for me having a pet now than before.